The grass is not always green throughout every season much like every tinder date cannot be a cakewalk and one has to bear the summer heat or a creepy date with an equally creepy kinky fetish. Here we come to the pointy end of the journey. Much like scrubbing the floors of the brewery or wiping and cleaning the vessels and sometimes fermenters, if you have the good grace to come across a ‘boss’ who is more or less the same as a OCD’ed mother. Such is the disposition of ‘The great Indian Bossman’. One has to work with no questions asked. What we see and what we are actually forced to do are completely different things. I shall cut straight to the chase on this one.
So here I was all naïve and basically chasing a pipe dream of working in a ‘reputed’ brewery, I prided myself in being the first person to get the job with a reputed Microbrewery from Bangalore. This was in the February of 2016. Very honestly let me just put it by admitting that I was quite narcissistic and unkind to those by far did not manage to secure a cash vending machine of a job, and boy was it a job which came with an overbearing and for some reason an English speaking fanatic dude, who could even make Her Majesty the Queen blush in embarrassment and then a somewhat strict yet haughty Masterbrewer, who seldom appreciated the naïve and unassuming curiosity that I exhibited. We do screw up, I mean I am not the best follower if I have to say so about myself, but I learn by asking a lot of questions that is about it!
It is here that I learnt apparently that what we might see as glamour is nothing more than a shoddy blue collar job, which is exactly unforgiving as those construction workers. I would rate my worst tinder dates higher here, if you believe me! For those who feel a sense of entitlement when you make a person work or accuse of sabotage please stop to think of it for 2 seconds. I am not the one here who will start the whole philosophical bullshit about ethics but seriously I never felt as pressured as I was made to feel in those 3 months that I worked in that overrated mess and chaos of a Microbrewery!
What goes behind making a glass of Craft beer is more false sense of entitlement by the wrong sort of people, the unnecessary throwing your weight behind foolish marketing and sense of expectation that crosses over into borderline sadism!
I feel no regrets of having written such a review but this was long time coming. We as people have the capability of analyzing ourselves more than our bosses. They come with an already screwed sense of bias and dreamy almost unrealistic expectation of business which god knows drives them where. The Craft brewing industry in my opinion needs a reality check, a company pays you the salary for the work you do and not for the fact that they have bought you and your silence towards things you might consider morally or even ethically unjust!
Pheww… that was heavy! Kindly note – I have no qualms or some unresolved issues here so please sit back and watch the drama finally coming to a close with my last part.
So gents… we finally come to the last part of the journey of The Drunken Cherub. You know the high of having smoked up some really good weed has to finally set and the reality kicks you hard in the gut (I would have used a better word here), let’s just say the same situation had dawned in the year 2017. You get a good chance of redemption but like the ghost of past tinder dates always seem to haunt the living daylights off you, I had become more on the lines of Kabir Singh, minus the weird time lapse of growing the beard while washing my face.
This second place was much closer to home base, i.e in Bombay, south Bombay if I have to be more precise for all the snotty southies and the mellower and somewhat withdrawn townies. The place was bang squeezed in a plush business complex that boasted a menu which far from its worth in terms of taste but as per reviews had a ‘tasty’ selection of beers! If I have to be point blank honest I have never seen a place that is so monotonous and zero quality driven as this one. Still I had to be the angry young man who was wronged and he was vying for redemption. People lack this phenomenon of common sense, and for what it’s worth a Harvard graduate astonishingly never knows the ropes and know-how of business from a grass root level. Hence my statement on the false sense of entitlement and if I may add one more thing, delusion!
You know the phase one has, where you are sort of cursing and beating yourself, that nothing ever seems to work straight forward was the same one I felt during the festivities of December 2017. While the office had become a haunt for happy and trigger worthy brewers attending a convention, the past made its way like a sneaky ex girlfriend in the form of my boss from Bangalore. I swear on my tinder that the man holds a grudge to this day against me! I never had any idea as to what sweet nothings he whispered to my boss and like a bad hair day things went probably with lightening speed from rosy and pink to all black and stormy.
I still wonder what a marketing team does when they have a bad product to promote. Counting that with a fresh peppering of a colleague which has an equally irritating kiss ass attitude and then you have a Co-founder who is all for micromanagement at all the wrong places. It amazes me that I had literally survived bad management twice in my professional career! Constructive criticism and accountability are far from being taken seriously in this industry. Here it is more important to sustain the egomaniac troll that is the ‘Bossman’.
One tries to fit in and be a part of the circus, but those who honestly cannot kiss ass will never be able survive even if they sleep their way up the corporate ladder. My defiance today does not mean I am dissing my former bosses but it just makes me wonder the logic and the sensibility to think practically and pragmatically, if they really know what that is.
Well… this me signing off with the hope that I may come up with something which is far more light and more scientific than this rubbish jargon, till then PROST!